Sometimes starting a conversation with someone new can be awkward, however, if you come prepared…it doesn’t have to be. You want to reach out to new people because that’s how you make more friends, make people feel important, serve others, and create lasting connections that can help both of you now and in the future.
Every conversation you start won’t always turn into a collaboration or friendship, but getting to know someone and focusing on their story may just turn into something more. You never know until you get to know them, right?
Small talk is all about sending the message that you want to get to know that person better.
Here are a few tips that will help you start out:
MAKE IT ALL ABOUT THEM
It’s so easy to become focused inwards, worried about what the other person might think of you. So, let’s go there for a second, what if they don’t like you? Then what? It is not the end of the world! I repeat, you have NO reason to NEED them to like you, your job is to serve them! To make them feel special while they are in your bubble. That is your ONLY task! If they end up not liking you, that’s on them, not on you!
I know it’s simple and you probably already know this tip. But it’s a great reminder that smiles really can change things! They can create relationships, initiate conversations, and make people feel loved and needed just when they need it most. Smiling shows you are warm and friendly, and who won’t want to get to know you when you’re full of kindness and charisma?!
SHARE A PERSONAL STORY
Maybe something really touching or even embarrassing happened to you recently. Don’t be afraid to share a story that is relatable or can make someone laugh. I know we said to make it about them, but sometimes people are shy or their shell is hard to crack if that’s the case… sharing a personal story can build empathy and trust, making it easier to have that desire for them to open up to you!
BE A GOOD LISTENER
When they are talking to you, show that you’re really interested and that you care. Being a good listener has a lot to do with your body language. Are your feet/body pointed towards the person that is talking or towards the door? When your feet are pointed towards the door, you’re sending the message to that person that you are bored and so ready to leave.
Really pay attention to what they are saying, it will give you a good taste of their background and help you to have more empathy for where they are right now on this path. It’s easy to want to figure out the next thing you’re going to say to them (it’s a very common thing if you have social anxiety), but just try the best you can to listen only! If you are really listening with your whole heart, the words to respond with will come to you must easier.
END IT WITH POWER
End the conversation with power by either telling them you really enjoyed talking with them, or you’d love to go to lunch and get to know them better, or that you simply hope to see them or talk with them again soon. Don’t be afraid to ask for their number and tell them you’d love to get together or stay in touch.
Here’s the perfect printable for you to memorize some great conversation starters. You can carry this with you and look at right before you go inside to a party or somewhere new to remind you of some great conversation keys. Another tip is to be prepared with your own answers for each of these questions, as you’ll be ready to answer them if by chance they spin the tables and ask the question back to you.
Go have a great conversation!! Remember, practice is what will make conversations easier and easier. Don’t expect new conversations to always be flawless…sometimes awkward silences can be beautiful, so if there happens to be some, simply embrace it!!!
Download your free printable here: